K-042 Zakho, Iraq

 1 Li dev me, li Kurdistanê rêkevtinêt zewacê li pêşahîkê, behra pitira vê, li def me Kurda wesan e, deybab pisyara kiçkekê dikin bo, bo kurêd xwe.          
Here in Kurdistan, marriage and wedding traditions, among the majority of us Kurds are as follows, the mother and the father ask for the hand of the girl for their son.
 2 Ewilî dibêjin kurê/ yanî dibêjin kurêd xwe,   mi girtî kiça filan kesî bi dilê me ye, em-ê çin bo te xwazin.
First, they say to the son, that is, they say to their son, for example, we have seen that someone’s daughter is very suitable. We will go and ask for her.
 3 Piştî hingî şi nî dê pêkve çin mala babê kiçikê, dê seḥ kinê kanê keçik çawa ne, li çi malê ye.
Then, from that point they go together to the girl’s father’s house, they call her to see how she is, and her virtues.
 4 Piştî hingî yaʕnî dê êk û du nas kin ewilî, piştî hingî dê kiçik mi girtî rismê kurikî bînit an/ an jî hema wusa rû-bi-rûyî êk û du bibînin.
Then, they will get to know each other first, and then they will show the girl what the boy looks like, or they will just see each other face-to-face.
 5 Dê piştî hingê qerara xwe din. Hekû pêk hatin dê bêjit werin.  
Then they will make their decision. If they have agreed, they will tell her to come.
 6 E li def me Kurda ewê dîyekî hey, bêjinê xwazgînî, şeva xwazgîniyê. Divêd wê şevê biçit, ji bavê kiçikê, kiçikê bixwazin.
Among us Kurds there is another thing that happens, they call is xwazgini (request), the night of the xwazgini. They have to go on that night and ask for the girl from the girl’s father.
 7 Hekû bidinê, dirist e, dê zivirin mal û piştî hingî dê berheviyêd xwe kin bo roja dawetê.      
If they give her to him, it’s all fine, they will go home, and after that they will prepare for the wedding day.
 8 Li dev me Kurda jî, e du şe/ du roj in. Roja tilxenha ye, e ji berê telxenha me rojeka hey şirînahî ye. Yanî ḥelaqê dikin destê kiçik û kurikî.
Also among us Kurds, it’s two night/ it’s two days. It’s the day of “telxenha” (finger-henna) and before the telxehna day we have the “sherinahi” (sweets) day. So they put the rings on the hands of the girl and the boy.
 9 Piştî hingî mehr-id kin û roja tilxenhayê, e roja tilxenhayê tên mala bîkê ku tila bîkê-w zavayî herduka digel êk xenha dikin, ev tila wan a biçîk.  
Then they bind the marriage act and on the day of Tilxehena, on the day of Tilxehena they come to the bride’s house so they can put the fingers of the bride and the groom together in henna, which is their small finger.
 10 Û roja dî şi nî çin, e e malê kiçkê ḥazir dikin û zava tê dîf ra, bin qaʕê an jî hekû çi ciyê wana bit.
They go again the following day, they prepare the girl at home and the groom comes for her, they take them to the venue or another place.
 11 Gelek cara yêd me yêd Kurda ji ber suriştê Kurdistanê dibin ji der ve jî dawetê dikin, ne îla li qaʕekê, tiştekê bit. E, wesa ne.  
Many times for us Kurds, because of the beautiful nature in Kurdistan, they take them outside and do the wedding, not necessarily in a venue or a similar place. That’s how they are.
 12 Piştî hingî jî, yaʕnî bi lalê min muhîmiya serekî ew e ku her du pêkve bişên yeʕnî, divêt êk û du nas bikin, gelêk biborînin. Ne mi girtî êk-ij ber pare bit an jî mi girtî sebaretek dî bin, ne.    
And then, for me the highest priority is that they both want to be together, they must know each other, spend (life) together. Not that, for instance, for the sake of money or for another reason, no.
 13 Behra pitir dev me/ dev me Kurda ew e, ewilî pirsiyara başiya wana dikin, da bizanin ku eve rast e, ez-id şêm jiyana xwe gel vê kesê qetînim.  
Among us Kurds, it’s mostly like this: First they ask about their virtues, so that they know it’s right and can say, “I can spend my life with this person.”
 14 Çikî, wekî hin zanin ne rojeke du we mi girtî ya zewacê, divêt piştrast kin şi nî bo xwe mi girtî bînin. Ne hema yekî li ʕerdekê dîtbit an jî…
Because, as you know we don’t get married just for one or two days, they have to be certain and from then they should marry, not just by seeing somebody somewhere or…
 15 Daʕwet çawa çêdibe, daʕwet, şahî ?
How does the wedding happen, the wedding and celebration?
 16 Wextê roja dawetê hindek, rastî hindek kesên me def me kurda nevêt dengî bikin. Yanî ne misecilek hil-id kin, ne tiştekê, ne divêt gele qerebalix çêbit.
On the day of the wedding some- indeed some of our people among us Kurds don’t want to make a noise (celebrate). As in they don’t turn up an amplifier, nothing, they don’t want much noise to be made.
 17 An êk carî heger an mala bîkê an mala zavayî taziyek hebit.  
Or in case either the family of the bride or the family of the groom have a period of mourning.
 18 Êk car dev me Kurda wek bê-iḥtiramiyekî ye mi girtî hekû êkî taziyek hebit dengî ji xwe bînin mala dawetê.
It is a total disrespect among us Kurds for the wedding house to make (celebration) noise when someone else is holding a funeral.
 19 Bes hekû ne, xweşî bit, tebʕen dawetêd heyn hunermenda dgrin, an jî hunermendî negirit jî wekî dîceyekê-t înit, yan hema bes deng e wek sîdîyekê tiştekê dawetê dikin pêkve.  
But if not, if there are no problems, of course in some weddings they hire singers or if they don’t hire a singer they bring someone like a DJ or they just put on a CD or something and celebrate together.
 20 Hin carêa yêd heyn dîf kesa dimînit, hindek ji zelam cida dikin jinik cida dikin. Yê hey jî he wekû mi girtî bîk û zava mi girtî nêzîkî êk bin, dotmam û pismam bin, dirist e jinik û zelam digel êk dawetê dikin.
In some of the cases it depends on the people, some separate the men from the women. There are also some that, for instance, if the bride and the groom are close, if they are cousins, then it is fine, men and women dance together.
 21 Bes hinekêd heyn cida dikin. Ew e, ewê dîyêd dawetê.  
But there are some that separate them. That’s the way it is with weddings.
 22 Destḥine çawa ye, destḥine ?
How is the Henna done, the Henna on hands?
 23 Roja tilxenhayê, wextê tên mala bîkê ku destê wana xenha kin, jinkekê an jî mi giytî, jin/ jinbira zava behra pitir, an jî hekû zavayî jinbira nebit, dişa wî ya/ xwîşka zava ya mezin, destê herduka/ destê bîkê xenha dikit.
On the day of the Tilxehena, when they come to the house of the bride to put Henna on their hands, a woman, or it has to be the wife of the groom’s brother mostly, or if he doesn’t have a sister-in-law, the groom’s eldest sister, puts henna on both their hands – on the hand of the bride.
 24 Û birayê zava yê mezin an jî mi giytî pismamekî wî, an jî hevalekî wî yê nêzîk destê zavayî xenha dikit.  
And the groom’s eldest brother, or it has to be one of his cousins (the son of his father’s brother), or a close friend of his will put henna on his hand.
 25 Piştî hingî jî ew hindekêd heyn zavayî-w bîkê digel êk-id înin mala bîkê destê wana xenha dikin, bes hindek jî ne, me/ tila bîkê li mala bîkê xenha dikin û tila zavayî mala zavayî xenha dikin, yaʕnî nayên def êk, hindek.
After that, some people bring the groom and the bride together to bride’s house and put henna on their hands, but some others don’t, they put henna on the finger of the bride at the bride’s house and put henna on the finger of the groom at the groom’s house, so they don’t come together, some.
 26 Vêca ew ciyawazî ya kesan e, yê bivêt her duka tînin def êk piştî hingê ḥela/ piştî hingî dawet {cî dî ve}, berdewamiya şevê da dawetê dikin.      
So that is the difference between people, if they want they bring both of them together and after that, after that dance, they dance for the rest of the night.
 27 Yaʕnî mala bîkê bi cih-id hêlin, çin mala zavay vêca dest pê dikin hekû bi dawet ve bin daweta xwe dikin. Ḥemî diçin serê bîk û zava.
So they leave the house of the bride and go to the house of the groom and begin, if they have reached the time of the wedding they celebrate. They all kiss the foreheads of the bride and groom.
 28 Tepʕen ewê dîyek e li def me Kurda, xelatekê bo dibin, çi roja tilxenhayê bit yan jî roja dawetê bit, gustîlk bit, bazin bit an jî mi gitî pare ya vê gavê bûye modêl, para ber zavayî ve dkin.
Of course there’s a thing among us Kurds, they take a gift for them, either on the day of the Tilxenha or it might be on the wedding day, whether it is a ring, a bracelet or it appears that money has become a trend these days, they stick money to the groom’s chest.
 29 An jî, piştî hingî jî, eve ne hema xelatê dûmahîkê ye, me roja “sersibehînkê” ya hey, xelkêd, êk car mirovêd zavay, idçin pîrozbahiya zavayî-w bîkê dikin.
Or after that, this is not just the conclusion gift, on the day of “sersibehink”, the people, especially the relatives of the groom, go to congratulate the groom and the bride.
 30 Roja piştî ze/ piştî roja dawetê, çin mala wana jî, ewê rojê jî mala zavay xwe amade dikin, yaʕnî zanin dê gelek mêvan bo ên. Xwarinekê berfireh amade dikin bo mêvana.        
The day after/ after the day of the wedding, they go to their house, on that day as well the house of the groom prepare themselves, as they know many guests will come. They prepare a large feast for the guests.
 31 Siheta te xweş.
May your health be well (thank you).